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| Mosaic "Christ in Majesty" at the Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception,* Washington D.C.
πυρ ηλθον βαλειν επι την γην και τι θελω ει ηδη ανηφθη
[Jesus said:] "I have come to cast fire upon this earth
And [cast fire upon] what I will if it already be kindled"
-----LUKE (12:49) (MacAdam's corrected translation)
His ancient endurant ember sparks. THE BIBLE FOR ZOMBIES blog drives its fiery first post into the heart of the vineyard. This open narrative aims to promote awareness of the new BIBLE FOR ZOMBIES SERIES by Lehan MacAdam; PART ONE: NOMAD, was released today, 12-21-2012, in the stealth of a hyped cusp. The Messianic Zombie apocalypse begins with a gnarly bite out of the Abrahamic brain. It's the end of the world as we know it. I feel fine.
Explaining the back-story which inspired MacAdam to title his series "THE BIBLE FOR ZOMBIES," fleshes out an introduction to revelatory word-craft stripped naked inside its pages. A lampoon upon the surface layer of the title, spoofs the popular trademarked "FOR DUMMIES" series, in which a plethora of beginner's guides to various topics are published, such as: CAR MECHANICS FOR DUMMIES, and various volumes of like title. But don't be fooled by the mundane slapstick. Satire is the highest martial art. The Bible itself is a series of satires only understood inside their proper historical context. The Messianic backhand Jesus delivers across the face of the communion, illustrates this topic at a level of pertinence which stings petulant cheeks:
ειπεν ουν αυτοις ο ιησους αμην αμην λεγω υμιν εαν μη φαγητε την σαρκα του υιου του ανθρωπου και πιητε αυτου το αιμα ουκ εχετε ζωην εν εαυτοις "...Unless You Eat The Flesh Of The Son Of Man And Drink His Blood You Have No Life Inside Yourselves"
---JOHN (6:53)
This is certainly not a call for God's children to become a pack of flesh eating zombies. This parable is an all too obvious satire, which is only understood inside the greater context of the war between the Jews and the evil of Rome's Empire. Two very great fires were more than the so called eternal city could bear a wink at in the mirror. The legacy of the light bringer would be buried beneath hypnotic rituals of kneeling--standing--kneeling--standing ... and genuflections ad nauseum. This voodoo calisthenics was spun in tandem with confabulated dogma, to ingrain falsehood as truth and darkness as light. One must know right off, that "laity" means "the illiterate ones" in Latin. The clergy crafted the adolescent B-movie doctrine of Transubstantiation, to steer assemblies away from the literary meaning of the gospel, towards ends the Creator never intended.
Blood drinking is prohibited under Jewish Law. This meme is the twitching fly in the ointment of the Eucharist Parable, and that fly's dance of death, mimes the vector of the riddle's resolution. The Body of Christ is not called to eat human flesh (or demi-god flesh), any more than Ezekiel really ate a single scroll of prophecy. Information is digested, but not by a physical alimentary canal churning with real bile, pepsin, and hydrochloric acid. Literal revolutionary blood, poured out on the battlefield, is consumed by the nation in a literary manner, to nourish the soul and reorient the polity. The bloody meat eaten is award winning post-war prose that cuts the goat's jugular. The chosen are called to resensitize themselves to the reality on the ground. The Kitos War from THE REVELATION was to come all too soon. The fact that the English word "host" still means "army" / "regiment," unmasks the the multifaceted sacrifice all live off. The Son of Man proposes a self-examination for those with ears to hear the complaint of the troops that suffered and died for Monotheism and freedom. Are you ready to drink from the Lord's Cup? (i.e. Ready to "Bite it for immortality through regeneration?") :
...Unless Boys Fight For You---You Die
Too many boys are sacrificed
Because too many men ignore their duty to the truth for too long.
The term Son of Man (referencing the Hebrew Ben Adam) merely means "descendant of Adam," i.e. "a human," and the latest generation of chosen created. The Zealot boys did not recklessly steer Israel towards a near death experience. Zeal resisted evil at a critical time which allowed the Mosaic legacy to survive, and expand just as greatly as the Hebrew prophets had foretold. The throngs of India, China, and the entire planet, were all saved from Caesar's dinner plate by the reddish-headed Jew. Like a vineyard stake in a vampire's heart, the potency of the true communion message flexes its muscle in the historical context which BIBLE FOR ZOMBIES author, Lehan MacAdam, spells out using Biblical prose and classical commentary. MacAdam is the first to whip out the smokin' big guns of shockingly obvious evidence, revealing all four gospels were written as part of a literary puzzle by the Jewish historian and general Josephus Flavius, who waxed in deadly pseudonymous sedition against Imperial Rome. The variations between the gospels collate to keys in his great works titled WARS OF THE JEWS, and ANTIQUITIES OF THE JEWS, which Joe wrote under his official Imperial autograph. The divine inspiration of the gospels is now proven, for the most artful literature ever to commandeer this planet, has finally been released in high definition. Apparently none other than MacAdam was ever capable enough, or had the requisite cahones for the job.
Of all the ciphers MacAdam cracks in "PART ONE" of THE BIBLE FOR ZOMBIES series, (subtitled "NOMAD"), the most gravid is the uncanny skill Josephus had for the double-entendre. The pen is indeed mightier than the sword, and none unsmudges the entrails mightier, than an automatic weapon in visible (albeit highbrow) spy-ink:
και εχων εν τη δεξια αυτου χειρι αστερας επτα και εκ του στοματος αυτου ρομφαια διστομος οξεια εκπορευομενη και η οψις αυτου ως ο ηλιος φαινει εν τη δυναμει αυτου ...Out of His Mouth Came A Sharp Double-Edged Sword ---REVELATION (1:16)
MacAdam reveals how lethal skill with double-entendre, bounced Rome into the hands of Rabbi Josephus. Layers of meaning dovetail one into the other with precision. An entire genre of recently published New Age reassessments, fancifully read the gospels as malicious Pagan spoofs of Judaism. Such humorless musings collapse before the finish line, as they fail to realize the gospels are instead coded records of tragic history on the laugh attack, in the mold of astute Jewish parodies of Paganism, written to supplant Paganism with Monotheism. Thus Jesus instructs the Last Supper celebrants of the New Passover with a lampoon of the Dionysian mysteries. The farcical treatment is stuffed full of sexual innuendo in the original street Greek. "Jesus grabs the loaf. He cracks it. He gives it to them!" This is a Zealot Sabbath Night Live skit, using common humor to promote a very serious message of rebellion from a Roman empire run by a lecherous Baccanal. Any who would be the Anointed One's follower, was required to pick up the rebel cross and follow Him to their death in the revolution. Who would deny the troops their laughter along the difficult way? The thick layered complexes of double-entendre, cut nowhere any sharper than they do in the zombified Eucharistic parable itself. MacAdam carefully chooses synonyms of translation which preserve timeless euphemism. Repeating the standard fare of the common English Bible:
"...Unless You Eat The Flesh Of The Son Of Man And Drink His Blood You Have No Life Inside Yourselves" ---JOHN (6:53)
As neatly explained by the synonym between "host" and "army," this riddle emphasizes the vicarious salvation a military force offers to the general populace, along the lines of Churchill's famous quotation: "Never was so much owed by so many..." Yet the Eucharist Parable wacks the walking dead on their rotten cheeks, in a sick attempt to wake them into life. Though the Zealots only got to run an Israel independent from Rome for a mere four years, the Zealots secured immortal victory nonetheless. The bump in carnage could not compare with the massive consumption of human life tallied by the slaver's empire on a steady annual basis. The statement of JOHN (6:55) is plain. Human flesh is truly food and human blood is truly drink, and they are still consumed today in massive quantities. If you need to see visual proof, visit a pit-mine in South America or Africa for more than a minute. The Galilean revolt was absolutely necessary to secure the legacy of Moses from out of the fangs of the Imperial carnivore. Tired of all the criticism from the real walking dead, Josephus injects a hot load of sexual spunk into the response he shoots at his critics. Consider the Greek word σάρκα (sarka) which is usually translated as "flesh." The English word "meat" is just as valid of a translation, but its substitution uncovers a timeless street euphemism not as apparent using the word "flesh." Along that same vein, the Greek αἷμα (haima) means "blood," but especially blood being shed, a "hemorrhage." Blood is vital fluid issued in spurts. Carefully chosen words render a pearly street euphemism, whereby the man who fell to earth tells his critics that they all can service him down below:
"...Unless You Eat The Meat Of The Son Of Man And Swallow His Vital Fluid You Have No Life Inside Yourselves" ---JOHN (6:53)
Family is blood, of a love connection which only exists due to a vital genetic fluid discharged in a hemorrhage. Joe's family spilled their blood out in sacrifice so that others could be free. Critics of every stripe are scolded with the butt-head of Joe's double-edged sword:
It is indelible, whether you can swallow it or not
Galilee and its General won a global victory against Pagan Rome Yes it really is this huge This large and in charge Then, the Son of Man---who is the WORD made flesh---grabs his big loaf of bread (i.e. the Holy Scripture), mocks the Zombie King of Pop, and coos: So 'Eat Me!'
Before one assumes this quasi-sexual innuendo originates in the dirty mind of the linguist, or originates in a coarse persona of the gospel author, one must become informed about the shockingly open homosexual excesses which the ancient Latin historians note for Nero and Titus Caesar. Josephus tallies 97,000 Jewish boys taken captive by the fall of Jerusalem in 70 AD. Most of these captured boys were between eight and eighteen years old. Many of them wound up as sex-slaves in the brothels, or as house boys. To get a full-frontal introduction to the evidence, one must pick up a copy of THE BIBLE FOR ZOMBIES: Part one: NOMAD.
ואראה והנה־יד שלוחה אלי והנה־בו מגלת־ספר׃
ויפרש אותה לפני והיא כתובה פנים ואחור וכתוב אליה קנים והגה והי׃ ס
ויאמר אלי בן־אדם את אשר־תמצא אכול אכול את־המגלה הזאת ולך דבר אל־בית ישראל׃
ואפתח את־פי ויאכלני את המגלה הזאת׃
ויאמר אלי בן־אדם בטנך תאכל ומעיך תמלא את המגלה הזאת אשר אני נתן אליך
ואכלה ותהי בפי כדבש למתוק׃ פ
Then I looked
And behold a hand was sent unto me
Look! In a roll of a book!
And He spread it before me
And inscribed it inside and outside (exoterically and esoterically: the old "in out in out")
Writing lamentations and mourning and woe therein
Then He said to me: “Son of Adam! (Ben Adam: “Son of Man,” created being, mortal)
Eat what is coming!
Eat this roll! (this scroll, this tube of written words, the WORD OF GOD)
Then go speak to the House of Israel
So I opened my mouth and He made me eat that roll
And He said unto me:
“Son of Adam
With this roll I am, giving you, feed your belly (also your womb or your issue)
Fill your guts with it!”
So I did eat
And it was sweet
Like honey in my mouth---EZEKIEL (3:1)
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The picture above is of a shirt being marketed online. The author of this blog does not know whether this shirt is an officially licensed product. The image is provided solely as documentary news, making an original commentary of a critical nature about an artistic statement made by a popular television serial. The character Beavis as "Cornholio," either by design or creative accident, provides a humorous lampoon of the great "Christ in Majesty" by the artist John De Rosen. Measured to be the largest mosaic on the planet, this huge work of art is housed in the highest building* in Washington D.C..
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